Bristol VS Levi

First, I want to say hello to my first follower! Hi! Thanks for reading. I hope you find my blog useful.

Now onto today's post. In the past few weeks, we've seen a lot of Bristol Palin and her baby's father, Levi Johnston. They've both made the rounds on various TV shows talking about teen parenting, each other, teen pregnancy, blah blah blah. All adults know that parenting is hard work. It is the never-ending, always challenging, mostly rewarding job for which your pay will not come in the form of a check. It will come in the kisses and hugs and love of your children. And if we do our job well, we will protect our children from having children before they are prepared.

I have never wavered from my position on Bristol Palin's pregnancy. I certainly agree with her that abstinence is the best way to avoid getting pregnant, but I will add that there is a responsibility of parents to be approachable and willing to discuss all issues relating to teen sex. I wonder if Sarah and Todd Palin did this?

On a recent episode of Oprah, there were two 14 year olds who were dating, along with their parents and the topic was sex. The two (barely) teenagers felt that their relationship had reached the point that they were ready to have sex. Oprah had a psychiatrist (?) on the show who asked the couple a few poignant questions. She first asked how long the two planned to be together. The girl said a long time. The boy said 6 months to a year which was very shocking to his girlfriend. In response to her horrified look, he said,"What? It is high school!"

Next, she asked how often they planned on having sex. Were they planning on having sex every time they could? The boy said he would leave that up to his girlfriend who had still not recovered from the love of her young life giving their relationship a death sentence.

The conversation went on with the kids but what I really appreciated about it was what the parents had to say. They clearly had spoken at length with their kids and recognized that if they wanted to have sex there was little that could be done to stop them. They made sure both kids knew the risks of disease and how effective different forms of birth control were. The boy's mother also said that she did everything she could to make sure the kids didn't have the opportunity to do anything while they were in her home, calling on friends and family to stop by unannounced in the afternoon before she came home from work.

Did these two extremely young kids have sex? Honestly, I don't know. I turned off the TV to make dinner or help with homework or some other parental task. I truly hope not. Here's what I learned though. Kids don't get sex. They don't understand the emotions that accompany it at all. They simply see it as a physical act. As parents, we need to ask the tough questions so they truly understand what they are getting themselves into. Here are some ideas for taking your next conversation about sex to the next level, thanks in part to Oprah.
1. Why do you want to have sex?
2. How long will you be together?
3. How often do you plan on having sex? Who will decide?
4. Who will be responsible for birth control (not you, by the way)?
5. If the girl does get pregnant, what will you do? Where will you live? How will you finish school? Who will care for the baby? Who will pay for the baby's needs?

As for Bristol and Levi, it is unclear what they are doing now. Bristol appears to be hitting the circuit as an ambassador of abstinence? Is this a paid job? Has she finished high school? Is she going to college? Is Levi able to see his son or is his relationship with the Palin's so fractured, he doesn't have the courage to be around them and therefore doesn't see his son?

Regardless of where they are, let their public drama become an example for you to share with your kids about how even the best intentions don't turn out the way people plan. Particularly people whose brains are still growing.

Enjoy your day!